Nikki Glaser's Sharp Golden Globes Jabs at CBS, Warner Bros., and Epstein Files

Nikki Glaser's Bold and Unapologetic Golden Globes Monologue

Nikki Glaser delivered a sharp, unfiltered opening monologue at the 83rd Golden Globe Awards, weaving together humor, industry commentary, and current events in a way that left the audience both entertained and slightly uneasy. Known for her bold style, Glaser didn’t shy away from controversial topics, making her performance one of the most talked-about moments of the night.

A Bidding War Joke That Dropped a Few Names

Glaser kicked off the show with a clever jab at the ongoing bidding war for Warner Bros. Discovery. "We'll start the bidding for Warner Bros. at $5. Do I hear $5?" she asked, directly addressing the CEO of Warner Bros. Discovery, David Zaslav, and Netflix co-CEO Ted Sarandos, who were in the audience. The joke was met with laughter, setting the tone for a night filled with pointed humor.

She quickly shifted to a more serious note, referencing the unique position of the Golden Globes as an event that celebrates both TV and film. "We're here in the heart of Los Angeles, where no TV or film has been made for the past six years," she quipped. This line highlighted the irony of the event taking place in a city known for its entertainment industry.

Taking Shots at the Epstein Files

Glaser’s monologue then turned to the recent controversy surrounding the Epstein files, which have sparked widespread debate about power, privilege, and accountability. "I cannot believe the amount of star power we have in this room tonight. It's insane. There's so many A-listers," she said. "And by A-listers, I do mean people who are on a list that has been heavily redacted."

The comedian continued by giving the Golden Globe for Best Editing to the Justice Department, saying, "That's what they do. They edit everything." She also took aim at CBS News, calling it "America's newest place to see b.s. news" and joking that it had won the award for Most Editing.

A Controversial Joke About Leonardo DiCaprio

One of the night’s biggest laughs came when Glaser turned her attention to Leonardo DiCaprio, who was present for his "One Battle After Another" nomination. "What a career you've had. I mean, countless iconic performances. You've worked with every great director. You've won three Golden Globes, an Oscar," she said. "And the most impressive thing is that you were able to accomplish all of that before your girlfriend turned 30."

After receiving a round of applause, Glaser apologized, acknowledging that the joke was "cheap." She admitted that there wasn't much known about DiCaprio beyond his public persona. "Like open up. Seriously, the most in-depth interview you've ever given was in Teen Week magazine in 1991. Is your favorite food still pasta, pasta and more pasta?"

DiCaprio nodded in agreement, confirming that he still loves pasta.

A Touch of Dirty Humor

Glaser’s brand of humor also included a few risqué jokes. She joked that the movie "Sinners" saved Warner Bros. Discovery "for about a month," before pivoting to praise Michael B. Jordan for his role in the Ryan Coogler film "The Harder They Fall."

"I can't believe it, we got two Michael B. Jordans. When I saw that, I was like Nikki B. Jerkin," she said. She quickly followed up with an apology to Jordan, who was sitting next to his mother. "I'm so sorry. I should not have said that to you. That should have been a DM," she said, as the camera caught Jordan’s mother taking a big sip of water.

A Host with a History

This marked Glaser’s second consecutive year hosting the Golden Globe Awards, a role that many consider to be the first major TV and film awards show of the year. The event was broadcast on CBS and also available for live streaming to Paramount+ Premium subscribers.

Glaser’s monologue was a mix of wit, satire, and social commentary, reflecting the current state of Hollywood and the media landscape. Her performance set the stage for what promised to be an unforgettable evening of celebration and critique.